Back in the Saddle

Well for those of you who know me, it is very needed to say that I am not going to literally be back in the saddle tomorrow.  What I am going back to tomorrow is Church.  I have been debating this for quite some time, and I have decided to take the plunge.  I am a bit nervous.  My nervousness consists on several levels: a) the fact that I have not been in a long time gives me some anxiety, b) the expectations that I will have, not having the minister that I am most comfortable with, and c) does not have anything to do with Eisenhower, but I am afraid that I will go into some sort of internal break down due to the unending debate that will ultimately be going on inside my head.  (For those of you who did not catch it, the list of nervous levels is an allusion to American President.)

As an historian, I cannot help but look at the Bible as an historical document.  As such, I see it as written by men and not God.  This alone is somewhat detrimental to the principles of the Church.  What is more, I continually analyze and doubt the translations that I have been given, as well as feel the need to search out those documents which were not allowed to be a part of the New Testament.  Then again, even the old testament is flawed with multiple interpretations within one story; just look at the creation story. It is these questions that will lead to the huge debate that may not be contained in my head.

My goal for tomorrow: feel out the community of Grace United Methodist Church.  For me, I do not believe that it is required by God to go to church.  It is simply there for a sense of community and perhaps help when you need it.  Once I have found the church that fits my community needs, then I may be able to help address my problems and anxieties over my faith.   In the future, I hope that any help I receive can be returned back to the community.  That, after all, is what the Church really should be about.